Q: How many Arians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Only one Arian, but an awful lot of light bulbs. (*smash*) - zobacz
What do you call a cow with no front legs? Lean Beef - zobacz
Q: How can you tell if it was a shared computer used by many staffers? A: There is writing on the White-out. - zobacz
How many skunks do you need to make a house really smelly? Just a phew! - zobacz
A draftee went in for his physical wearing a truss and with a little convincing acting got his papers marked M.E. for Medically Exempt. Afterward a friend borrowed the truss to wear for his physical. At the end of the examination the doctor stamped M.E. on his papers. "Does that mean I'm medically exempt?" he asked. "No," answered the doctor. "M.E. stands for Middle East. Anyone who can wear a truss upside down can certainly ride a camel." - zobacz
Why couldn't the cow leave the farm? She was pasteurized! - zobacz
What do rednecks do on Halloween? Pump-kin! - zobacz
What did the little ghost eat for lunch? A booloney sandwich! - zobacz
The night before her wedding, the bride-to-be talked with her mother. "Mom," she said, "I want you to teach me how to make my new husband happy." The mother took a deep breath and began, "When two people love, honor, and respect each other, love can be a very beautiful thing..." "I know how to fuck, mother," the bride-to-be interrupted. "I want you to teach me how to make a great lasagna." - zobacz
Four expectant fathers were in a Minneapolis hospital waiting room, while their wives were in labor. The nurse arrived and announced to the first man, "Congratulations sir, you're the father of twins." "What a coincidence!" the man said with some obvious pride. "I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team." The nurse returned in a little while and turned to the second man, "You, sir, are the father of triplets." "Wow, that's really an incredible coincidence," he answered. "I work for the 3M Corporation. My buddies at work will never let me live this one down." An hour later, while the other two men were passing cigars around, the nurse came back. This time, she turned to the third man, who had been quiet in the corner. She announced that his wife had just given birth to quadruplets. Stunned, he barely could reply. "Don't tell me another coincidence?" asked the nurse. r After finally regaining his composure, he said, "I don't believe it, I work for the Four Seasons Hotel." After hearing this, everybody's attention turned to the fourth guy, who had just fainted, flat out on the floor. The nurse rushed to his side and, after some time, he slowly gained back his consciousness. The nurse asked, "Sir, are you all right?" "Yes" says the man, "I'm o.k. now. I just had a shocking thought. I work at the 7-11 Store." - zobacz
What does the dentist of the year get?...A little plaque. - zobacz
Making Snacks by San Widge - zobacz
Two Virginia boys, Sonny and Rick, went out hunting and split up. Sonny heard some rustling in the bushes and, by mistake, shot his friend. After trying to remove the bullet, he carried Rick to a doctor. Two hours later, after the physician had patched up the wounded hunter, Sonny asked, "Please, Doc. How's my friend?" "Well," answered the M.D., "he'd be a lot better off if you hadn't taken out his gut!" - zobacz
The Doctor was puzzled "I'm very sorry but I can't diagnose your trouble, Mahoney. I think it must be drink. " "Don't worry about it Dr. Kelley, I'll come back when you're sober." - zobacz
How many LA cops does it take to change light bulb? Six. One to do it and five to smash the old bulb to splinters. - zobacz